Making a marriage work is not easy – anyone with a spouse would perfectly affirm so. If siblings can find it within their freedoms to squabble, what about two individuals who have grown up for most of their lives within different households and endured varied experiences thus amassing dissimilar outlooks? It surely must be tougher!
There will be good and bad times, but you manage to make it through all by remembering the little things that make you love your significant other, and why he or she is the one for you.
Of course, over the span of many fruitful years, arguments will arise. And many fear that this may be the argument that will make or break a couple. But now, one pair, which has matured together over the years is revealing how one woman’s wedding gift changed how they each viewed marriage. Hopefully, this revelation might improve another marriage somewhere.
Kathy Gunn and her husband have been married for close to a decade, more precisely, nine years and they have children together. On their wedding day, her great aunt gave them a wedding gift. The gift had a unique instruction attached to it…they could not open it right away. The imprecise instructions left for them told them to wait until their first argument.
Definitely, with such a foreboding instruction, the couple remained unsure of exactly when they would have an argument serious enough to warrant opening the seemingly ordinary present. But it is only now that they remembered the gift, and have benevolently chosen to reveal what was inside…
Now scroll down to see what Kathy’s great-aunt had in store for them!
Tonight, we tucked our kids in bed and my husband and I enjoyed a glass of wine on the deck. We were talking about how excited we were to attend an upcoming wedding in Kalamazoo (where we met and went to college) and discussing what would be the perfect gift for the newlyweds.
So, I thought back to our wedding day (nearly 9 years ago) and tried to recall the gifts that had meant the most to me. The funny thing? The gift that meant the very most was still sitting in a closet… unopened.
On our wedding day, my husband Brandon and I received a gift from my Great Aunt Alison. On the plain white box was a card that read, “Do not open until your 1st disagreement.” Now, there had obviously been plenty of disagreements, arguments and slammed doors throughout our 9 years. There were even a couple of instances where we both considered giving up… but we never opened the box.
I honestly think that we both avoided turning to the box because it would have symbolized our failure. To us, it would have meant that we didn’t have what it takes to make our marriage work – and we’re both too stubborn and determined for that. So, it forced us to reassess situations. Was it really time to open the box? What if this isn’t our worst fight? What if there’s a worse one ahead of us and we don’t have our box?!? As my Great Uncle Bill would say, “Nothing is ever so bad that it couldn’t get worse.”
All along, we assumed that the contents of that box held the key to saving a marriage – an age old trick – unbeknownst to us rookies. After all, my Great Aunt and Uncle had been married for nearly half a century. So, we thought the box would save “us” – and in a way it did. That box went beyond what I believe my Great Aunt had intended. It was by far the greatest wedding gift of all.
For 9 years (and three moves) that box sat high on a shelf in various closets gathering dust, yet it somehow taught us about tolerance, understanding, compromise, and patience. Our marriage strengthened as we became best friends, partners, and teammates.
Today, we decided to open that box, because I finally had a realization. I realized that the tools for creating and maintaining a strong, healthy marriage were never within that box – they were within us.”
What an interesting and empowering story!
Truly, this box is the best gift for any newly married couple. Thanks to the box, Kathy, and her husband, Brandon realized that all the tools they will ever need to mend their marriage and make it even better are not in the box but deep within them. They acquired life lessons like; tolerance, understanding, compromise, and patience that would have been hard if not impossible to master, through marriage counselors or from any other person.